craigslist >pittsburgh > The guy who mugged me - m4m

[NVInc 0]

The guy who mugged me - m4m

Date: 2008-10-18, 2:59PM EDT

Thanks chief, you really made my evening. I was just thinking a few days ago "wow it's be a while since anyone stuck a gun in my face" Then you came along like a soft breeze in the night.

I think you did a pretty good job, however I could offer a few pointers.

1. After someone has turned out their pockets, that means they are empty.

2. If I don't have a wallet why would I have a bank card?

3. While I didn't have anything in them, I had more pockets than you checked.

4. People often times hide money/drugs in their shoes or socks. Make sure to check those on your next target.

5. A simple please and thank you are always welcome

6. I can understand why you took my cellphone, you didn't want me calling the cops. But really, it's the only thing I had. Why not just strip the battery or something? I really needed that. Plus the thing is like 8 years old, you can't even sell it. Jerk.

7. Pick better targets, Occams razor might help here. If he looks poor then it leads to believe that he is poor. Why risk jail time, and serious time at that over a poor guy, at least get some cash outta the deal.

8. By being a African American mugger you are really reinforcing stereotypes.

I hope this helps mugger, I really hope you are enjoying my phone. I kept calling but you won't pick up. I'm so sad

Also, quick note to the cops. A guy at 3 in the morning jumping up and down and waving his arms in an X shape over his head needs help, he is NOT waving hello. But thanks for smiling and waving back, really made my night.

To the cars who wouldn't stop for me in south oakland, looking back I don't blame you. I hear there are criminals on the streets.

[NVInc 0]

craigslist >  seattle-tacoma > Husband for adoption - low rehoming fee

Husband for adoption - low rehoming fee

Date: 2008-09-19, 5:57PM PDT

My husband said it's him or the dog? So, it was a tough choice, but the dog only takes up part of the bed, and he doesn't steal the covers, so I'm keeping the dog.

Husband has tendency to wander, likes to sleep all day, will play with his balls, isn't house trained, but will beg to go out. Needs fenced yard without grass to mow, a home with plentiful food (favorite food is pizza) and drink (loves beer). Gets along well with other dogs, doesn't much care for cats or children. Has little redeeming value, but he is cute. Comes from a long line of hunters, would love to be your hunting companion. Knows Sit, Heel, Stay, and Down. Doesn't always do them? But he knows those commands, don't let him try to convince you he doesn't. Is current on all shots, pretty healthy, has had his teeth cleaned recently, and is NOT NEUTERED. I'd be happy to help pay for the neutering.

Too good home, fee negotiable, I know I can't get anywhere near what I've got in him back. Comes with 49'ers T shirt, large flat screen tv, and a big truck but only the T shirt is paid for.

Serious inquiries only!

[NVInc 0]

craigslist >  vancouver, BC > Seeking a sexual tyrannosaur for a romp in the park - w4m

Originally Posted: Sun, 12 Oct 15:14 PDT

Seeking a sexual tyrannosaur for a romp in the park - w4m

Date: 2008-10-12, 3:14PM PDT

I am a very career-focused, attractive, 5'9, 120lb woman who is seeking a man who is willing to fulfill my ultimate sexual fantasy. I am an executive with a very successful corporation that keeps me very busy and I sometimes have difficulty finding men who share similar interests to my own in the bedroom.

Nothing turns me on more then Jurassic Park themed role play. You must be the animatronic dinosaur, and I must be the helpless child (Tim or Lex) stuck in the park at your mercy.

You will growl mechanically into my ear and stare threateningly. I will feign panic and search for the flash light in the back seat of the visitor jeep. You will sniff at the window slowly and then release a robotic roar into the night air. I scream for Alan Grant, but your over sized robot jaws come crashing down through the overhead window, pinning me to the floor.

I cannot stress this enough however, you must play as a ROBOTIC dinosaur. This is very specific, my interest lie entirely in animatronic dinosaurs, not real ones. I thought I should mention this as there have been unfortunate miscommunications in the past, leading to performances that have left me without an orgasm.

Other situations could include you being the dilophasaurus and spitting in my face and then going for my jugular. Or you could be the ill and moaning triceratops, and I would be Ellie Sadler, digging through your stool to find the source of the ailment. More or less any scene from the film involving a mechanical dinosaur interacting with a human will do fine.

I don't like wasting my time, so make sure you do your homework and watch the film and make sure you can fully embrace the mindset of an animatronic dinosaur. I am an incredibly sexual person and I would make it a blockbuster night that you would never forget.

    * it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests

PostingID: 876586707